Shadow Work & The Alchemy of Integration

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

- Carl Jung

Shadow work has been a buzz word for a while now and it's nice to see that so many people are finally getting curious about taking such a leap into the depths of self awareness. So what is shadow work and how the heck do you do it?

Shadow work as a term originated with Carl Jung, a Swiss psychoanalyst who coined the concept of the "shadow self." This part of us is made up of all the unconscious parts we deny. Our conscious ego doesn't want to identify with these parts and so it rejects them- hiding them away in the unreachable parts of our minds until we go looking for them (or until they unexpectedly rear their head, but we'll get to more of that later).

To fully understand the shadow self you have to be aware of the three layers of consciousness that exist in the human psyche. The first is the conscious mind. This layer of ourselves refers to everything in our immediate awareness. Whatever you are currently experiencing, external input from our senses, and what you are thinking right now are all examples of this layer. If you're aware of it right now, it's your conscious mind.

The next layer is the subconscious (also known as the preconscious). This layer is like a storage room of all of our memories, behaviors, and knowledge. It is where dreams are made. Every thought, experience or impression exists here, ready to be recalled at any moment but just out of the awareness of your conscious mind. Our learned skills and habits become a part of our subconscious over time and the information we need is always there for us to use at a moment's notice.

The third and final layer is the unconscious mind. This is the part of ourselves that is made up of deeply buried thoughts, memories, beliefs, and instinctive/primitive desires. Things in your unconscious mind may come from early childhood before you could remember anything or it may hold experiences that are too threatening to the ego to be fully acknowledged.

Now "ego" is another word that gets thrown around all the time in the spiritual community; often with disdain and shaming tied to it but in reality the ego is just you. It's your sense of self and who you are in the world. In fact the word ego is just the Latin word for "I." This is your every day self and personality. It's the conscious mind in action. Our egos allow us to experience the world from a state of "other-ness" rather than oneness. This means that we get to go through life as ourselves and participate in this reality to gain the wisdom that our souls came here to get from our own unique perspective. Nothing wrong with that!

Now that you have the foundation of how consciousness is layered and what the shadow self is we can delve into shadow work itself. Shadow work is the process of uncovering, transmuting, and integrating the parts of ourselves that we have pushed away and disowned. This could be anything from a long forgotten memory that had a traumatic impact, to innate interests and skills we were never allowed to explore. Our long-held habits, beliefs, and impulses reside here; as do the darker traits we like to deny like jealousy, rage, or selfishness.

Shadow work can be done through meditation, self-inquiry, therapy and coaching, journaling, dream analysis, inner child work, breathwork, plant medicine, or anything else that helps you to become more self-aware. Anything that gets you take an honest look at the way you express yourself and move through the world can help you on your journey. This process is not for the faint of heart as there are many things that will come up that can make us feel the need to negatively judge ourselves if something particularly distasteful appears to our awareness. Cognitive dissonance will also abound as you begin to explore certain beliefs and ideas you may have carried your entire life that no longer serve you. This is why it is necessary to enter this practice with an open mind and the gentleness you would show a young child trying to learn something new. It's ok to feel lost, intimidated, or scared. It's also ok to feel excited! When I first began my shadow work journey it was invigorating to be getting to know myself on such a deep level.

As you continue on this path you will experience a multitude of emotions. You will soar to great heights and dive to your darkest depths. It will feel overwhelming at times and as you peel back layer after layer you will keep discovering new parts of yourself that you may have never known otherwise. This can be lifelong work, or done for a short time for a specific purpose. Whatever your reasons may be for starting shadow work, you get to choose how far you go to explore yourself.

The ultimate goal of shadow work is to become aware of the things that might be holding us back in some way and remove the blocks that cause us (or those around us) pain and suffering. With it we can change our limiting beliefs, release ourselves from the grip of trauma, become all-around better people , and start consciously creating a life that we actually love. It is an integral part of manifestation work and an integral part of being a responsible member of the human race. But the goal is not to destroy your ego or "cure" yourself of something that is wrong with you. In fact, when you enter this path with the idea that you need to be fixed that in itself is shadow!

As we gain awareness of these things in our shadow self we can begin the process of integration. Integration means taking parts of you and uniting them into your self once again. Whatever you learn or discover can be used in your daily life. By acknowledging these previously disregarded aspects we can transmute them into something positive for ourselves. For example let's say you struggle badly with feelings of envy. Let's then say that the root of this challenge lies in the belief that you will never be able to have what you want. By becoming aware you can start to change this belief and even begin to use those feelings of envy to fuel your motivation to move forward.

So what about the better stuff that could be hiding? You might be carrying around an untapped talent or trait in your shadow that was not allowed to shine through for whatever reason. Maybe you are highly creative and love to paint but your parents thought it would be better to discourage this or you lacked access to creative mediums. Maybe you have the ability to lead but it was buried because timidness is more valued in your social circle. As you explore your shadow you might find some pretty fantastic things that you can integrate into your life as well!

You will know it's time to do shadow work when something triggers you, when life feels stagnant or painful, when you have a health problem that persists, or when you feel like something is missing but you don't quite know what it is. Remember that discomfort can often be our greatest call to healing!

To get you started on your journey here are 15 great shadow work questions you can ask yourself to begin exploration:

- What lessons do I still need to learn?

- What toxic people should I distance myself from? Why do these people currently appeal to me?

- Am I a victim of trauma? Have I done enough to heal?

- What are my deepest fears? Why do I think I'm afraid of those things?

- How have I been distracting myself?

- What do I judge negatively the most in others? How do these things appear in my own   personality or behavior?

- What did I love doing most as a child that I no longer allow myself to do? Why don't I allow   myself this joy anymore?

- What patterns in my life continue to show up?

- What is the worst habit that I have? Why haven't I let it go yet?

- What could I possibly be being called to heal right now?

- What areas of my life make me feel the most amount of struggle?

- Think of a challenging situation that recently occurred. How did you act or react to it?

- What do you believe about love? About abundance? About your self worth? Examine the beliefs   you have in all areas of your life and try to identify ones that may be limiting you.

- How do I punish or sabotage myself? How can I be kinder to myself and allow myself to thrive?

- What negative emotions am I most uncomfortable feeling? What bad thing would happen if I   allowed myself to feel these emotions?

Were those difficult to answer? Did you feel uncomfortable being honest with yourself or did it feel natural? If that wasn't as fun as you thought it would be then you were probably doing it right! That's not to say that shadow work can't be enjoyed, but it can be a challenge. This is especially true when what we are exploring makes us feel bad about ourselves. So if you got through those and feel like you want more I am proud of you. If these questions have inspired you to move forward and dig deeper into the world of your shadow self then I highly encourage you to sign up for The Illuminated Garden's Shadow Work Pathway where we spend 4 weeks digging deep and learning how to navigate those parts of ourselves that have previously been neglected.

However you proceed with your shadow work journey will be personal to you, and only you will be able to know where you need to shine the most light. Collect as many resources about this work as you can and if you are working through heavier parts of your shadow like childhood trauma make sure you enlist the help of a trained therapist to support you. Remember that healing is always possible. Good luck on your journey!